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I was reading the story about this poor lady being abused

www.bbc.co.uk/news/uk-...

And got to thinking about good nicknames. Any come to mind?

I seem to recall a thread a few years back on the matter, might even have been on the Shine board, with some great ones.

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know i guy who gets called because a kid in his primary school called him Jeffery, due to rhyming with McCaffery. A terrible nickname, and most people think his real name is Jeff

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gets called Jeff**

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anyone from Omagh on here should know of Ann-Marie sausage fanny...

I don't think I need to explain why? Except for the fact that they were frozen sausages...

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surely the non-frozen variety wouldn't have the rigidity for insertion, was there any ice burnage?

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Who was it that worked with a guy called ManBat? So-called because his real name was Wayne Bruce

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fuck me lads, some of these are hilarious

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Jesus I forgot about manbat, amazing

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ManBat is brilliant

Know a few bombscares - for similar reason as pothole

Was a girl known as *name* diddy ride when I was younger dont even know if she gave them out they were just enormous, had to get them reduced for health reasons

Soggy sock another one as someone pished in his sock and he put them on

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When we were teenagers my friend and I gave niuknames to people to pass the time during Mass.

The blue whale (fat woman who wore blue coat)
Crow (looked like a crow)
The poddington peas (family who all had pea shaped heads)
Juicy fruit (fella who was always chewing)
Rat eating potato (fella who looked like a rat eating a potato)
Mr soft (girl who walked funny like the tv ad)
busted sofa (girl with ugly squashed face)

it gave us a laugh anyway

also a girl in Omagh called Thumper cos she liked to thump her feet off the ground while getting finger bashed...

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Are you one of the ones standing outside that womans house, tormenting her as she leaves?

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ManBat lol. Brilliant

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Has anyone ran into someone years after school and now insisting to not be called by their nickname anymore? Nah that's not how it works lad lol

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Yes. There was a chap I went to school with whose nickname evolved from winker(no idea why), to wanker, before finally settling as "The Wank".

He was strangely quite proud of this moniker back in the day, not so much now when it's yelled at him while he walks down the street with his girlfriend.

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Manbat lol

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I remember my first boyfriend telling me that him and his friends had nicknamed me Flora cos I was 'easily spread'

LOL

I was actually frigid and the complete opposite!!! But I thought I was so cool after that...

FML

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Haha. Wee polyunsaturated Duffy

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ejay • 2 years, 9 months ago
There was a fella in my school that admitted to teh lads in first year that he didn't wank stating that "it burns." He was called burny for 7 years after that.

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TJ Goldfist • 2 years, 9 months ago
Similarly, a boy at my school apparently mentioned at PE one day that he had what he thought was 'too much foreskin' because it sort of drooped down well beyond the tip of his bellend, and still gets called fiveskin to this day.

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RP.com • 2 years, 9 months ago
My mate has been called Fruits his whole teenage/adult life as he looked like a guy in a fruit pastilles ad

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Mohammed Lopez • 2 years, 9 months ago
I knew a guy called OPERATION ARSE cos he was in hospital with a rectum malfunction and always smelt of shite

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Haha. Saw him a few weeks ago. Smelled of imperial lather. Gutted I was.

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Stiles • 4 years, 4 months ago
We once overheard a colleague engaged in a bizarre but serious argument with his friend who used to call in to our office every lunchtime, whereupon extreme lying would ensue.

They were debating the biggest shit they ever did, when my colleague matter of factly declared that he did a shit so big that morning he had blocked one of the office toilets, had to waddle to the next cubicle, blocked it too, and repeated this in a third cubicle. There was absolutely no evidence of this in the toilets.

He was known as '3-hole Noel' from then on.

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haha TJ. Similarly 2 friends of mine are called the shrews nose and the flying squirrel for the aesthetics of their nether regions

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Disgusted and aroused in equal measure by that duffy

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lol I membah that fiveskin one. Cracker.

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The shrew makes an appearance at most friends weddings these days when the chant starts 'show me the nose, show me the nose'.

yes grown adults do this but its kinda funny

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Does the shrew whip out the nose on request?

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I've a mate called batey and that's all I've known him as even now.

Nickname came from wanking loads as a kid and shortened from masterbates

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I’ve a mate from Omagh and he told me about Marie sausage fanny. Poor girl. Also told me about Queer Pat. Caught riding a dead horse.

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Guy i work with claims he went to school with ManBat, he also said there was a guy in the same school who had got a pretty serious shoulder injury and it left one of his arms slightly longer than the other and he was known as 'Clock' from then on

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Lol

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Lol @ clock

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What's the craic with the shrew? Huge clit?

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Two brothers I know called Slap and Tweedle. Most original nicknames I know.

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Clock haha

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lemac it's a fella... I think he doesn't have much foreskin if that's a thing?! but it looks like this
apparently. I haven't seen it up close. wordinfo.info/unit/373...

The other one can pull his out to look like a flying squirrel www.crittercontroltria...

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You had them all wanking over that earlier.

Hahha

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Was he circumcised?

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munchingmonster • 53 minutes ago
You had them all wanking over that earlier.

Hahha

Is this thinly veiled homophobia from munchingmonster? Really hope not.

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ye wha?

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Really hope so TJ.

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There was a kid who lived near me called Fun House because he was on the TV show Fun House. Not very creative, but still pretty funny.

The best of the lot was a friend of a friend who sadly passed away some time ago called Jason Boyce whose nickname was Chasin' Boys.

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